Nicolas Winding Refn, a casually dressed youthful-looking guy, sits in a Paris apartment while getting his fortune read from a deck of cards. His fortune teller, an old Parisian man with disheveled grey hair and an artist’s beard, decodes his cards– Refn has pulled from the deck the equivalent of “working for success.” The man reminds him that one must work for pleasure, whereas working for success only destroys creativity. Then the camera turns to his wife Liv, and she is asked what she ideally wants from her husband. Her response: A family man. And so, here begins the introspective journey of director Nicolas Winding Refn, a man who wants both a successful career and thriving home life, a respected name in the film world, but above all else, happiness.

Just shy of an hour, My Life Directed by Nicolas Winding Refn is the perfect glimpse into the world of the director, whose repertoire of films to date is nothing but impressive. The 44 year-old, who brought us the Ryan Gosling dramas Drive and Only God Forgives, has earned a total of 25 wins and 36 nominations for his work. So, who better to capture the intimate and personal moments than his wife Liv Corfixen, who steps out from the shadows of his “doting wife” and becomes a director in her own right. It is quite funny to overhear Refn “strongly suggest” different camera angles she should use while making the film, proving that the title of this documentary is extremely accurate.

Drive‘s success seems like a double-edged sword to Refn; his popularity has skyrocketed and has opened many doors, yet his personal “bar” is set high as he competes with himself to outperform and out-succeed it.

Corfixen gives audiences a glimpse into her world as a mother with a working husband and their two cute and very active children. In the film, the family is staying in a Bangkok apartment for six months while they shoot the film Only God Forgives. It’s in this setting where we observe Refn in his zone: parenting skills on display one minute, and the next, he is making revisions to his script and reorganizing the scenes of his film on note cards. It’s quite the juggling act that Refn compares to a chess match, a game in which he cannot afford to be the checkmate.

The documentary, which is half subtitled (they speak Danish), is a behind the scenes look at not only the film he is working on, but the life of the director which makes for a very entertaining watch, especially those with an interest in filmmaking, Refn himself or Ryan Gosling. Gosling does make an extended appearance in the film, and seeing him in natural light and interacting with Refn’s children is refreshing. Off-screen Gosling is quite the comedian too, cracking jokes and being an overall good guy. Seeing Gosling and Refn bounce ideas off of each other in approaches to Only God Forgives will definitely make you want to re-watch it.

Behind the flash, the celebrity and the camera, we see a man who is insecure– questioning, self-doubting and over-thinking. He is the one who made Drive, pre-any expectations. Drive‘s success seems like a double-edged sword to Refn; his popularity has skyrocketed and has opened many doors, yet his personal “bar” is set high as he competes with himself to outperform and out-succeed it. It becomes quite emotional as Refn privately (until now) struggled to find clarity, as he tells his wife, “I’ve been working on this film [Only God Forgives] for three years, and I still don’t know what it’s about.” My Life Directed by Nicolas Winding Refn is an artist’s tale of growth and development, and this documentary is refreshing proof that no one is immune to pressure and insecurity.